Aries (March 21–April 19)

You're fueled by adrenaline and poor pacing decisions. The stars suggest you *try* not to sprint the first mile of your "easy run." Mars says: chill. Your Garmin says: lol.

Cancer (June 21–July 22)

Emotionally attached to your race medals, gels, and that singlet from 2012. Mercury retrograde says: it’s time to clean your gear drawer. Your toe socks from high school disagree.

 Libra (September 23–October 22)*

Indecision hits hard this week. Trail or road? Intervals or rest day? Gels or chews? Just lay down in your running kit until the cosmos decides for you.

Capricorn (December 22–January 19)

Discipline is your middle name—but Saturn warns of burnout. Take a rest day. No, a real one. That 8-mile "recovery run" at marathon pace? That’s just denial with laces.

Taurus (April 20–May 20)

Stubborn as ever, you'll refuse to buy new shoes despite the gaping hole near the toe. Your knees file an official complaint to HR (Hamstring Relations).

Leo (July 23–August 22)

You wore sunglasses to your group run at 6 a.m. The moon is in selfie mode, so this week’s miles don’t count unless they’re on Strava *and* Instagram with dramatic lighting.

Scorpio (October 23–November 21)

Intensity alert! You “accidentally” turned your shakeout into a threshold run and scared a local dog. Jupiter advises fewer death stares at joggers who "run-walk

 Aquarius (January 20–February 18)

You've created your own interval training philosophy based on lunar cycles and YouTube videos. It may not be effective, but it *is* unique. Strava followers = up.

Gemini (May 21–June 20)

Two personalities, one runner. Half of you is training for a 50K, the other just wants brunch. Venus recommends you run to the brunch spot and call it a tempo.

Virgo (August 23–September 22)*

Your training log is color-coded, laminated, and alphabetized. Unfortunately, the universe scheduled a surprise IT band flare-up. You’ll survive—with a spreadsheet.

Sagittarius (November 22–December 21)

You signed up for a marathon on a whim, then booked a vacation the same weekend. Your legs are confused and your flight bag has 3 pairs of trainers. YOLO.

 Pisces (February 19–March 20)

You ran 4 miles to process a dream you had about running. Neptune says you need a training plan with fewer vibes and more structure. But also—good for you, poet.